6 kids and TWO rules

We hear a lot from people when they learn that we have six children. Usually, when I'm out with the kids, we hear such a wide variety of comments. The kids have heard them all, and usually have responses at the ready.

Here are some of the normal things we hear, along with some typical responses:
- "My, you sure have your hands full, don't you?"
---Typical response from the 4 year old: "no, she doesn't. We carry everything for her."

- "These aren't all YOURS, are they?"
--- "No, she stole some of us from a lady in another state, but we're not supposed to tell anyone that."

- "Haven't you figured out what causes that yet?"
--- "You mean there's a way to STOP this?"

- "Don't you have cable?"
--- "No, my dad thinks cable is too expensive. College savings funds are much cheaper!"

- "Well, God bless you!"
--- "Nah, He already has. But if you want, you can make a donation to help Him help us."

- "How in the world do you do it?"
--- "Do what? You mean I'm supposed to DO something? Wasn't giving birth six times enough?"

- "You must have the patience of a saint."
--- "Nah, I just have a very large belt."

- "Your children are so well behaved. How do you do it with so many?"
--- "That's easy. I beat them regularly, whether they need it or not."

Now you know we don't really beat our kids. Besides, the whole subject of 'discipline' deserves it's very own blog. What this one is really about is the HOUSE RULES. We have kids in our church that love coming over to our house because of our rules. Our house rules are legendary. When we try to explain them to parents, we usually get the glazed over looks, or the little snickers and something along the lines of "well, that would just never work for us". I really don't understand that at all. Our rules are pretty straighforward. They're very simple. Every single one of our children know the rules by heart. There is not mistaking the rules. There is no deviation from the rules, EVER. When they go out in public, or over to a friends house, they are asked to repeat the rules before they leave us. It's never been a problem. As I said, the rules are easy. They are...

1) Do what you're told.
2) Be polite.

That's it. It's that simple. We've learned that if they can follow those two simple rules, they will stay out of trouble. If they break either of those rules, BAD THINGS HAPPEN.

The beauty of those two rules is that they really encompass everything. All of the petty rules, the long rules, the stringent rules, that most kids are forced to remember and live can be easily summed up with our two.

If an adult asks or tells you to do something, you do it. You don't backtalk, you don't question, you don't grumble or complain. You just do it. If you have something to say about it, discussion will follow, AFTER you have done the deed. (We have, of course, discussed how far this rule goes regarding doing things that would violate personal space, or personal integrity.) If Mom asks you to do the dishes, but it's not your day, you do them, then explain that you did them yesterday. She will then be very nice and not make you do them again tomorrow. If Dad tells you to feed the dogs, but you already did it this morning, you feed the dogs, then let him know that you were the one that did it that morning. He will thank you for obeying, then let you know that you're off the hook for the rest of the week (or something along those lines). The important thing is to do what you're told to do, when you're told to do it.

If you are rude to your brother, if you hit your sister, if you backtalk your mom, if you ignore your dad, then you are breaking rule #2. Those things are just not polite. Calling someone a butt head, or burping in a restaurant are a violation of Rule #2. See how that one works?

Basically, the kids appreciate that they don't have a long list of things to remember. They know to do what they are told to do, and any other action is checked against Rule #2. If if seems like it would be RUDE, then it's a no-go. If it doesn't violate Rule #2, then it's generally ok.

These seem to work for us. I like their simplicity. I love hearing the baby repeat them to her friends before she does something. She'll say, "You shouldn't do that, because it's really not polite, and that's against Rule number 2". Her friend will ask "What do you mean? How many rules do you have?" And she says, "Only two. Do what you're told, and be polite. That means obey and be nice. Even *I* can do that!" It makes me smile.

What kinds of rules do you have in your family? How do your kids respond to your rules?